You Are Viewing at the mall

So I was working on a bunch of articles while at Starbucks today like I usually do. I was sitting in one of the couches, typing away, when all of a sudden this woman comes up and gestures at the couch opposite me, as though asking if she could share the table. I didn’t say yes. Actually I sort of just blinked and frowned since apart from the baristas and the occasional Ned Parfan (hi Ned! :D), I’m not used to people suddenly approaching my table, so I was startled. But that didn’t seem to matter, because before I had any time to respond she just went ahead and sat down, took out a laptop and started setting up on the table.

A few things made the whole thing seem not quite right to me. First of all, she didn’t have a drink. Second of all, the shop wasn’t actually full. Out of growing suspicion, I actually scanned the place and found a few empty tables, so it wasn’t like she just had no other place to sit.

The distrustful little brat that I am, I didn’t say anything, but I just sat looking vaguely bothered and hostile. It wasn’t purely an act, since I was in fact feeling bothered and hostile, because she was distracting me from my work. I kept glancing around and throwing glances toward her general direction, as well as a few toward the nearby guard. (more…)

My mom and I were eating at Teriyaki boy when some douchebag who was sitting in the booth behind me made a scene. He was either Japanese or Korean (I couldn’t tell exactly), and was there with his Filipino wife. He began drawing attention to himself by throwing his utensils on the ground.

When the waiter and manager approached their table to ask what’s wrong, the wife explained that he was mad because, supposedly, one of the servers was disrespectful in laying down his utensils on the table. From what I could hear, she didn’t face him properly while she was laying down the utensils, or was rushed about it or whatever.

Despite profuse apologies from both the servers and managers, the guy proceeded to bark “Bill out!” at the waitress manning the cash register.

Then the guy and his wife stormed out of the restaurant. Without paying.

See, here’s the thing.

I don’t care what country or fucking planet you’re from. You do NOT go around demanding everyone to conform to whatever protocol you supposedly have where you come from, throwing a tantrum and leaving without paying when you find service unsatisfactory.

Besides, what kind of distorted hypocritical shit is that? You feel like someone has been discourteous, so you proceed to throw things around like a fucking two-year old and act all mad, then leave without paying for the food on your table. I seriously hope that this isn’t really a cultural thing–because I would hate to meet an entire group of people who are so mind-blowingly unreasonable–and more just a story of an asshat who likes to act like he owns every establishment he steps into.

And one more thing. The wife? Instead of trying to reason with the guy, all she did was explain to the staff why he was angry, like she was his lawyer almost, sounding as though she found his outburst justifiable. It was like watching a bad mother sticking up for a bratty kid. So really, as much as I wanted to punch the guy in the face for being so retarded, I kind of wanted to give her a jab too, because she was tolerating it.

I’d also like to see him try to pull that kind of crap in some seedy diner in the middle of Manila.

Today one of the girl baristas at my usual Starbucks surprised me by  bringing the coffee to my table instead of calling me to the counter (special treatment! lololol). It was way nice, but then she commented that I don’t go there often anymore.

And I thought–

–because I had already been there three times this week. They expect to see me there every day now? :’D LOL. Granted, I will probably end up spending more time there (maybe not go there more often, but just stay there longer) when I finally get my netbook.

Oh right–I NEED A NETBOOK. I suppose I’ve needed one for months now but I’ve put off buying it (for good reasons, really), but now I’m starting to feel like only having one place to write–my desktop, in my room–is starting to take its toll on my work. So now I’ve decided to buy one, and hopefully the fact that I’ll be more productive will mean that the thing will pay for itself in the long run. :D  I think I may have been subconsciously using that same excuse for my long-term caffeine dependence.

As an added bonus, when I finally buy a netbook, people may finally stop wondering whether or not I have a job and why I have the luxury of being at the mall on many a Tuesday afternoon. You see, I am no good at explaining these things. Some of the baristas already know that I work freelance, but I don’t usually get into detail about exactly what I do, so I could be a freelance drug dealer for all they  know. :D

I can’t decide which one to get though– the Asus Eee 1000HE or the 1005HA. They’re very similar inside, with mostly aesthetic differences. I’ve read that the 1005HA is sleeker and better-looking, although I’m a bit partial to the matte screen and chicklet-type keyboard of the 1000HE. The keyboard is a big deal, considering I’ll probably be typing the hell out of that thing.

Does anyone have an opinion on whether a 3-cell battery would suffice or if I should spend on the 6-cell?

x x x

Plugging! IF YOU LIKE FOOTBALL AT ALL, or at least find it remotely bemusing, do check out http://larojaaaaa.tumblr.com. It’s the humor tumblelog that I’ve made, dedicated to the Spanish National Football Team (because that team, I swear, is comedy gold).

Yes, this is precisely the sort of shit with which I amuse myself.

It’s doing pretty well in terms of ‘likes’ and reblogs considering I only made it last night, LOL. I’ll definitely be adding more material regularly.

I like boots.

I’ve been wearing them for years; I have two pairs that I usually wear, both hand-me-downs from my sister in Japan. This is the one I use most often:

As you can see, they’re neither outlandish nor impractical since they only come up to a few inches past my ankles. (I have a knee-high green leather pair, also from my sister, that I never wear; I draw the line at some things, besides, it’s a tropical country.) But at the mall these ones still get odd stares from people, and sometimes even remarks and giggles when I walk past. It doesn’t actually bother me, but I do find it a bit… I don’t know, retarded? :’D  I mean, apart from the fact that they’re boots, which not too many people wear, there’s nothing remarkable about them.

But the thing that baffles me, is how people would find great interest in me plain ol’ scruffy footwear, and yet seem to have absolutely no problem with this big-ass billboard of Derek Ramsay wearing LEGGINGS UNDERNEATH DENIM SHORTS. :D

I would like to meet the creative director who thought it would be fashionable to put Derek Ramsay in this outfit, shoes and all, then stick him in a bath tub with unnaturally blue water. While posing like a pensive little teapot.

I mean, like, dude, you’re hot and all, but
leggings and… JORTS?!?!

x x x

I totally got caught off-guard this afternoon–I went to my usual Starbucks and one of the female baristas asked to take my picture. XD They said they were making a scrapbook with photos of their regular customers, for their desktop computer. Actually when they asked (“Liz, pwede bang magpa-picture?”) I immediately thought they meant they wanted me to take a picture of them–because that’s more commonly the case when I get that question–and I started wondering how they hell they figured out that I’m always armed with a camera. XD But instead it turned out they wanted me to be in the picture, and so I did, even though in my head I was like “WHAT IS THIS I DON’T EVEN–”, because I’m panicky that way.

They also asked what I was up to–which led me to explaining the embarrassingly cushy-sounding life of a freelance writer. (“Wala akong pasok, ever.”)* :’D LAWLZ. Seriously, whenever I have to summarize my job status I completely sound like an underachieving slacker. I guess it’s because I always omit the small detail of caffeine-powered all-nighters and rush deadlines.  :D I think I should be more concerned about this, but I just find it amusing.

Anyway, next time I’m there, I’ll ask to take photos of them so I could post here. They’re a cute bunch. :D

*”I don’t have to go to work, ever.”

For my “day job” writing ESL textbook material, I’ve had to frequent a website called ScienceDaily, which churns out plenty of the topics that I need. Now while most of the time the articles there are insightful and relevant (I stay up-to-date on their articles on caffeine), some of these headlines are full of lulz–some because they look like they were written by Captain Obvious, and others because they make you wonder how and why they discovered these things. I mean, check these out:

Americans Want Self-Respect, More Than Ever

Scottish People ‘Living Dangerously’ (It’s the kilts, isn’t it.)

Squirrels Show Softer Side by Adopting Orphans, Study Finds

Those Less Motivated to Achieve Will Excel on Tasks Seen as Fun (Unrelated note, I am great at hanging out at the mall.)

The Joy Is in the Social Hunt: Facebook Users More Engaged Emotionally When Conducting Specific Searches (This is true; I remember not being very emotional the last time I did a broad search.)

Dark Pulse Laser produces bursts of almost nothing

Dog Owners More Likely To Share Germs With Pets By Not Washing Hands Than By Sleeping With Dog

And lastly, my favorite:

Compulsive Behavior in Mice Cured by Bone Marrow Transplant

x x x

Guess who went to the spa today.

My dogs.

They were whisked off in a van, and were gone for half the day. When they came back, one was cleaner and looked several months younger, the other was shorn bald and looked like a different breed altogether, and both smelled like aromatherapy votive candles.

It's ok, fur grows back. Hopefully.

My family isn’t the type to afford our pets such luxuries on a regular basis (we can’t afford it), but their condition (read: flea-bitten and mangy) had worsened to the point that we couldn’t handle it anymore and needed the help of professionals. Actually, had they not come today we wouldn’t have found out that Shasha is preggers again. PUPPIES! :D

x x x

I didn’t get to post yesterday, but Happy Independence Day! We have a ton of problems as a country, but being a Filipino is still pretty kickass, if you ask me.

x x x

Remember the bridal entourage from this post? I swear, it’s following me. I went into Landmark yesterday and there they were, pretty much blocking off the whole footwear department. And then five minutes later, while I was at the lingerie section, they came marching in again. I could have taken a picture but I was too engaged in adding to my ever-growing collection of laughably cute knickers.

Ribbons! Because I'm bad-ass that way.

x x x

For the past two days my Blur fandom has flared up again and I’ve been obsessing over Damon Albarn. I didn’t realize it before but he looks kind of like James Dean–a scruffier, sillier version of. I might do a screencap picspam for my next post.

Today at Landmark Trinoma, I was on my way to the supermarket entrance when suddenly the guards started shooing me and the other shoppers toward the side of the aisle to make way for a parade: a handful of violinists in evening gowns wailing a painfully off-key rendition of Pachelbel’s Canon in D, followed by a bridal entourage. Apparently someone thought it would be a bright idea to promote their wedding products by having the entourage march through the supermarket lobby–which, like the hardware store, is a part of the mall most often occupied by people who are already married. I wonder how that brainstorming meeting went. They must have run out of coffee.

I almost felt sorry that I didn’t have my camera with me to take a photo of such a ridiculous sight, but that probably wouldn’t have been a good idea. Because then they might think that I appreciated it and would love to see their next line of bridal couture paraded around the next time I buy bacon.

* * *

About an hour ago I got a random text message from a jejemon whose number wasn’t on my list. All of the following text messages are verbatim.

Person:
Hey guyz,
Ny-ty-nyt na po,
Me church pa po
2m0rw,
Slip wel,
Swit dreamz,
Pray 1st,
Ny-ty-nyt ult
Mhuahh,

>,.g.m., ..<

Me [wondering if it's someone I actually know]:
Sorry, but who is this?

Person:
Gn0, sa y0uth bliw ka tlga
Save u numbr ku ha,
2l0p na b si bujay?

Me:
I don’t know you.

Person now identified as Gn0 from “youth” (whatever that is):
Hey b0y .f.y.i.
This is gin0 fr0m church, i d0n’t believe that u d0n’t kn0w me,
Hahaha what a big mistake…
D0n’t blame me cauze’ i kn0w and u kn0w that u kn0w me!
Maybe i sh0uld txt y0ur m0ther tita dheng,
By the way d0n’t w0rry i kn0w the cellph0ne number of y0ur m0ther..
And last, is bujay asleep?

Person now identified as gino from church, after I didn’t reply:
Hey nj,
Do y0u surrender u haven’t yet answer my questi0n? Let me repeat it again is bujay asleep?

That’s the last of it so far because I didn’t want to waste any more phone credits on this doofus, but to be honest this is kind of cracking me up. First of all, I’m curious about the circumstances and am forced to speculate that this is a guy texting another guy who gave him the wrong number on purpose. That would make sense, because I’ve only received a few messages from him and hell, I know that if it were me I probably would’ve given him the wrong number too. Especially if I were a dude. I almost want to feel sorry for this Gino kid, but at the same time he is incredibly annoying.

So far I’ve decided to ignore him and hope he figures it out on his own and leaves me alone.

That said, were I feeling a little more bored or mischievous, I do have a few other options for dealing with this bugger, like telling him to go ahead and text “tita dheng” like he said he could. That’ll be something. For now though, is there no way to block phone numbers?